How to Be More Assertive in Your Relationships
It's only natural to want to please your partner and friends or simply be accepted by someone. However, you should never try to be someone you are, not just to be accepted or loved. If you're not a person who speaks up easily, you'll need to devise a strategy to help.
Standing your ground can be intimidating in always any situation. Being more assertive in any relationship, especially new ones, is challenging, but it's crucial to build a happy life together and individually. After all, what is life about if not for relationships?
Assertiveness helps you do the following:
- Establish proper and healthy boundaries.
- Provide clear, honest, and open communication.
- Nurture a healthy and well-balanced relationship or partnership.
Thankfully just like any other skill, you can practice assertiveness that enables you to build stronger and more healthy, mutually beneficial relationships.
Be Honest and Truly Genuine
Never sacrifice your values, and don't be afraid to speak up even if it feels scary and uncomfortable. While partners should respect you, you can't blame the partner for your miserable condition if you don't speak up. You can't even assume they should know if you've never told them how you feel.
Improve Your Listening Skills
Assertiveness includes being respectful and courteous when sharing your needs but taking the time to listen to others as well. Make a conscious effort to understand their perspective, even if you don't agree. Being assertive does not mean one person gets only what they want when they want. It relies on the idea of an equal partnership.
Again, being assertive doesn't mean you will always get your way, or should you be rude and disrespectful to others. In fact, if you don't have empathy, patience, and respect for your partner or friends, you are not in a healthy relationship.
Be Truly Committed and Know Your Intentions
In other words, don't be indecisive about what you want before you communicate it or expect others to understand your expectations. If you're unsure what you want, it'll be difficult to relate it to your partner or friend. Keep doing the work needed to learn what you really want to ensure to let people know.
Being assertive doesn't mean that you are displaying aggression and control or authority over anyone but yourself. You won't always get your way, but that doesn't mean you can't feel heard, validated, and understood.