7 Ways to Stop Looking for Validation
Are you someone whose mood and entire day is ruined if you try to get approval from someone, and don’t get the response you wanted? If so, this is a big red flag that you are living your life trying to get validation from others, instead of from yourself. The only person who should validate you is yourself. You know yourself better, your skills and talents, your amazing traits, and your abilities. It is natural to want approval from others, but when you rely on that for your own happiness, you are only going to be disappointed.
Here are some different ways to stop looking for validation from others, and finally trust your own instincts.
1. Compliment Yourself Often
If you don’t want to get validation from others, that means validating yourself. What better way to do this than compliment yourself? The more you talk kindly to yourself and compliment yourself, both inside and out, the less you will feel you need validation from other people. This takes practice, but soon you will realize ALL you need is your own approval and acceptance.
2. What do You Want Other People to Say About You?
This is a good way to start being kinder to yourself and get out of the practice of looking for approval from others. Start by asking yourself what you hope someone else will say to you or about you. How would they validate you? Specifically, what do you want them to say?
Write it down, ands tart saying that to yourself.
3. Celebrate All Your Victories
Stop telling yourself there is nothing good about you or that you don’t deserve to be happy and kind to yourself. YOU DO. You just need to stop with all the excuses and negative self-talk. There is a LOT to celebrate about yourself, going far beyond your physical appearance. Think about your successes and triumphs, your skills and talents, things you love to do, what an amazing friend you are, how you have helped people.
When you identify your different victories, celebrate them. Celebrate them yourself, celebrate them with others, be proud of them.
4. Build Strength and Stop Looking for Approval
When you start struggling to not look for validation from other people, that is when you know you need to build your strength. We are talking about your inner strength here. Becoming someone who doesn’t care what other people think about you, how you look, what you do, or how you spend your time. This is your life, nobody else’s, so stop living for other people. They have their own lives to worry about.
5. You Know Yourself the Best
Another reason why you shouldn’t worry about validation from others is because you know yourself the best. Sure, people might have their opinions of you, but what do they know? NOTHING. What people see in brief glimpses doesn’t represent you or what you have accomplished, so that opinion is useless.
6. Selfies Should Be Fun
Have fun with your selfies! There is nothing wrong with wanting to make edits to feel more comfortable, as long as you are only doing it for yourself. Stop worrying about the right pose, the most flattering angle, smoothing out every line and wrinkle. You are a human being who is beautiful how you are, and as long as YOU like how you look, screw everyone else.
7. Practice Self-Awareness
Finally, try to have more self-awareness. This means looking past all those little judgments you tend to have of yourself, and be realistic. Celebrate your victories, appreciate yourself, flaws and all, and look beyond the surface. When you are more self-aware, you have a better understanding of how amazing you are, and you won’t need ot be told that by someone else.